Ambiguity
Blogs have given us a freedom to say what we want with ambiguity. Either hiding our identity or that of the person we wish to talk to. In many ways, we hope the mystery will shield us from the reprecussions we hope to avoid and yet foster an ephiphany to the one person we hope to reach out to.
I am not safe from this desire.
To the person who was once my Marshmallow, I find it hard to let go of you. But let go I must, just like you seem to have done. Though we have known and shared each other's life for the past 9 years, I feel that I still don't know you. Maybe because I wanted you for myself and did not entertain the fact that you had a life other than the one you shared with me.
I see you happy, without me. That's really the only thing I ever wanted for you. But I thought it impossible without me holding your hand.
To my friend across the miles, I hope you decide what you want us to become. I see that you are confused. Maybe because you don't know what to make of us. The absence of communication should not be the end of a friendship.
To my misunderstood paradox, you were a surprise I had hoped to discover sooner. But I think that our mutual interest may have simply made things awkward between us. Of course, the chance to touch a part of you I never knew existed, was exquisite, to say the least. I do hope we'll have more opportunities to get to know each other more.
To my moon child, I wonder what will become of us. Though I see a glint of interest in your eyes, I cannot assume it has a deeper meaning. But I fully intend to discover and enjoy our time together, limited though it may be. But with the shift of orbits, I wonder if we will have any congruence.
To my bookworm, I find myself renewing certain beliefs about love through your eyes. Our mutual passion for the written word has often made me smile. I want to show you love and yet, I feel it fails in comparison to the one you have shown another. How can I compete with that? The answer is simple: I cannot.
To those who were hoping I would say what needed to be said but failed to find themselves among the number above, maybe next time.
I am not safe from this desire.
To the person who was once my Marshmallow, I find it hard to let go of you. But let go I must, just like you seem to have done. Though we have known and shared each other's life for the past 9 years, I feel that I still don't know you. Maybe because I wanted you for myself and did not entertain the fact that you had a life other than the one you shared with me.
I see you happy, without me. That's really the only thing I ever wanted for you. But I thought it impossible without me holding your hand.
To my friend across the miles, I hope you decide what you want us to become. I see that you are confused. Maybe because you don't know what to make of us. The absence of communication should not be the end of a friendship.
To my misunderstood paradox, you were a surprise I had hoped to discover sooner. But I think that our mutual interest may have simply made things awkward between us. Of course, the chance to touch a part of you I never knew existed, was exquisite, to say the least. I do hope we'll have more opportunities to get to know each other more.
To my moon child, I wonder what will become of us. Though I see a glint of interest in your eyes, I cannot assume it has a deeper meaning. But I fully intend to discover and enjoy our time together, limited though it may be. But with the shift of orbits, I wonder if we will have any congruence.
To my bookworm, I find myself renewing certain beliefs about love through your eyes. Our mutual passion for the written word has often made me smile. I want to show you love and yet, I feel it fails in comparison to the one you have shown another. How can I compete with that? The answer is simple: I cannot.
To those who were hoping I would say what needed to be said but failed to find themselves among the number above, maybe next time.
posted by Aldwin Christopher at 6:28 PM
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