My Pillow, My Chocolate Chip, My Fudge

...I'm running out of things to call you.

Pretty soon, you'll be my everything. :)

Why do Relationships Fail?

Sam and I had an interesting conversation the other day. It's a common topic: why do relationships fail. We both agreed that communication is the key and that by not talking about what people want in a relationship, they end up making mistakes that ruin it.

But the question is, why don't people want to talk things out? I believe it's because people are afraid. Talking can lead to honesty and honesty leads to vulnerability. People, for the most part, don't like being vulnerable because they get hurt, more often than not.

It's also about pride. To have that "conversation" means that there is something wrong and that's something most people would not want to admit. They don't want to think that they or their partner might be doing something wrong. They'd prefer to live in ignorant bliss than admit that what they have is less than perfect.

But just because relationships are not perfect, it doesn't mean that they can't work. You just have to understand whether or not it's worth the effort of maintaining. There are some relationships that are harmful for you but there are those that help you grow. And just because the relationship stops or changes, it doesn't mean that it failed.

A lot of us have a preconception of what a relationship is or how it should work. Take romantic relationships. A lot of us want our significant other to be our everything and vice-versa. Yet, have you ever really thought what that means? It means making that person depend on you. What happens when you go away or when the relationship works? What happens to your everything?

I'm not saying it's wrong. I'd congratulate any couple who could be each other's everything and stay together. But I've realized how much you are depriving that person of who they are by wanting to be so integral to their lives. Wouldn't you rather see that person live and grow and be everything he or she was meant to be? To be connected and yet be two separate beings?

The Best Title

So what should it be?












"Gardening with style?" or "Where does a brother get a woman?"

If you got something better, let me know.

Is this what highschool should have felt like?

Before there was an "us"

I'm feeling better now.

I can think about you without feeling a cold emptiness in my heart. I can even smile when I remember those moments you made me laugh or those times when the world was just you and I. I don't feel bitter at all. Why should I? The wonderful thing about happy memories is that they can never be tainted by our present.

However, like all mistakes, there's just the tiniest twinge of regret because I know that I'll never have memories with you like that again. They become missed opportunities, like forgetting to bring a raincoat when you knew it was going to rain today.

But then I realized I'm not alone. A friend comes to the rescue, ready to share an umbrella. It's not big enough for the both of us to stay dry, but it's not so bad getting wet together.

So forgive me if I delete your old messages, hide away our pictures and keep to myself for a while. We can still be friends but I think I should keep my distance. There's just not enough room in my life for you right now. And I don't want to stay where I'm not welcome.

In time, things will go back the way they used to be...

Before there was an "us".

What a way to start the year...

I've been expecting for this day to arrive. I've dreaded it the same way a boy dreads circumcision or woman finding a lump on her breast. Sometimes you hope never having to face it. But sometimes, you get tired of avoiding it or waiting for it to happen. So you face it, just to get it over with.

It hurts but not enough to bring me to tears. Does that mean my love wasn't real? Or has time put enough distance between us that it no longer hurts as it should. I say that I'm happy for her but am I being honest? I knew this day would come. I've come to accept that it just wasn't meant to be, but does it make it any easier for me?

I know I was holding on to a shred of hope things would go back to the way they were but I should have known better. Ah, well, maybe it was real. After all, how could anything but love made me change the way I think about love and relationships.

So my silence is broken. Things will go back to the way they once were...just before I stopped writing here. What a way to start the year...