Sunday, October 21, 2007

Questionning your Beliefs

Gah! I had written an long article and then it gets deleted by the freaking system. I'll try to repost it again. Here goes:

There's a song in the Broadway Musical called Avenue Q entitled the Money Song. The lyrcics go:

When you help others,
You can’t help helping yourself!
Every time you
Do good deeds
You’re also serving
Your own needs.
When you help others,
You're really helping yourself!

Sounds selfish I know but it's the truth. After a series of life-changing events (ok, they weren't that life changing but still, they got me thinking), I decided to reach out to some friends that I hadn't talked to in a while to compare notes. We've talked about everything from life to love to sex and faith.

It's amazing but questioning your beliefs can either make you change them or adhere to them even more. I've written three articles so far (including this one) in the last few hours because I'm trying to figure out just what I believe in. More than that, it's made me feel more complete knowing just what my points of view are.

Some people might think that questionning your beliefs is asking for trouble. I don't think that's the case. Sure, you may end up forsaking what you once held dear but then wouldn't it be better holding on to something and knowing the reason why?

So, dear reader, if you have some questions, why not drop them here and let's see where they lead.

One More Chance

I was flipping channels this weekend when I came upon a movie trailer for a local film. I don't recall who the actors were - and frankly, I don't care. But the basic plot of the movie is about two people breaking up and what happens after. Needless to say, it was a tear-jerker because everyone who has even been in and out of love has experienced the same things showcased in the film.

The trailer asked the question most people who have ever been in a relationship want to know but fear the answer to:

"When should you hold on?" and "When should you let go?"

I found myself asking that same question too. For those of you who don't know, I just broke up with my girlfriend of 8 months. Though it is tempting to use it as a case study for this article, I'd prefer to speak in general. Still not comfortable talking about it and, as my "therapist" says, it's too early to tell.

The answer to those questions is the same to most of life's mysteries: it depends. On a lot of things. Mostly how you feel and the circumstance you are in. It would be great to be able to have an all-encompassing answer but that isn't always fair or accurate for everyone.

I guess the best way to go about it is just make a choice and see if it works. If it does, good for you. If it doesn't, well, you can ask the question again and give a new answer. In the end, whatever works for you is the best answer. Just make sure you answer it.

Discussions After Mass

My brother and I went to mass and at the end, he asked me several questions. Rather than go through them one at a time, I'll just write down what I answered:

No, I don't feel incomplete whenever I fail to go to church on Sunday. I don't feel God loves me any less. Because if that were the case, then God's love is not as unconditional as they say it is. Like the father in the gospel of the "Prodigal Son", the father loves his sons, regardless of what they do. That is why when the youngest son returns, he welcomes him back with open arms.

God is omnipotent; He doesn't need us to do anything for him. What He want is for us to do things for others. He doesn't need our prayers, he wants us to offer it to people who need it. He doesn't want our good deeds, he wants us to help people who can't help themselves.

People often pray because they want things. For a time, I stopped praying because I found it selfish how I kept asking God to give me things that I didn't have. In retrospect, I had them all along. Or rather, I could make them happen but I just didn't have the patience or the perseverance to make it happen.

Now, I've started praying again. I still ask God for things but not for myself. I ask Him to watch over those I can't because of distance and circumstance. I try to remember to thank Him too. After all, those he watches over are still safe. If there's one thing I learned at work, it's to appreciate the things people do well, even if it's their job.